(a school project by a Grade-8 student)
OUTLINE
This
term paper is an insightful presentation about Polygamy, an old and sensitive
issue that needs to understand by every young people and respect by
conservative individuals. From its very
definition, polygamy is a marital matter that will require extra sensitivity in
reading the whole paper. Some words may
not suitable, confusing or incomprehensible for young readers, therefore
guidance from parents or elder should require to raise.
Polygamy
is with us. From the beginning of
creation, it has appeared up to this day.
Different persons, different times and different situations but it is
always the same purpose – unity of two persons.
This term paper will discuss why it is forbidden for some and why it
seems not accepted but not avoidable.
It
will discuss the early beginning of polygamy that passes through different
religions. It will undergo the basic
understanding in polygamy and its roles from times dating back from the most
ancient times up to our present day, effects why it is good or bad and as conclusion
will give proposition.
INTRODUCTION
In
every new things that we do not exactly know, we student will immediately ask
what it is about. When heard of polygamy,
we ask ourselves what is polygamy?
Through some readings, the meaning of polygamy seems to be interesting
to know. Polygamy is derived from Greek
words, “Poly” means “many” or “several” and “gamy” means “marriage” and when
put them together it will mean many or several marriages. When it applies to human, polygamy means a
person having several marriages at one time.
It is the act of marrying multiple spouses, which means it is having
more than one husband or wife at one time.
There are two forms of polygamy:
the polygyny which means a man having more wives and the polyandry is a
woman having more husbands. Some say
there is 3rd which is the Group Marriage wherein it consists of
mixture of spouses from both sexes. A
person who went on many partners after each civil or legal relationship is not
polygamy. As long as there is no binding
contract between the two on their relationship like divorced or separated, it
is not polygamy.
That
is why it is important that we need to understand what is polygamy, how it
works and why it exists so that we will able to know where to put ourselves in
different situations. Understanding
polygamy, we will not prejudge people and we will learn to respect each other’s
belief, culture and opinion. People
should not be judgmental and always observe sensitivity and respect towards to
others regardless of any situation. But
amidst of the conflict between pro and anti, and polygamous and not, the key to
enter into any relationship is faithfulness.
SUMMARY OF TERM PAPER
Polygamy is a kind of marriage which legally allows multiple
partners. It has been in existence since
long time in fact it was started even the times of catholic prophets. During
those times, polygyny, which means a man having more wives, was very common
because it served as status symbol for great men that lead their people during
their times. It also served as tool to
make their race fast growing, intact and prosper their population.
Even up to these days, this is the very essence of polygamy but
aside from this, polygamy is carried out to not fail the affections between the
polygamous persons. It answers the most
common rational that men and women can possible fall in love with other person
aside from their first partner. Polygamy
has strong implications of having a strong family tie relationship and huge love
among the family members.
Polygamy has many effects that could be beneficial or
distractive. The main effects of
polygamy in marriage or relationship could be jealousy and inequality. There are no two persons alike. There will be one who will exceed over the
other. Just like in relationship, one will come out the most loved over the
other and thus treatment will differ. It
has health hazard for polyandry, which means a woman having more husbands
because aside from she needs to take care her children but her physique needs
also to attend her responsibilities to her multiple husbands.
It has also effects in children who are so vulnerable. Since polygamy is not openly accepted and
seems to be not a normal practice, therefore children of polygamous family
usually suffer the stigma of society’s judgmental people. Children are usually labeled as product of
carnal relationship only and suspected to be turned out grossly since they are
exposed to this set up of marriage thus they become independent when they go
out of their homes.
If there are good for these days, most often than not, the effect
of polygamy in a family is the solidarity.
The bigger the family is, the stronger, more durable, more stable and
more collaborative. The more polygamous
families, the more unity, solidarity and cooperation in the community. Knowing each other
But it is still not very popular choice up to this date. It usually looks against all odds which makes
it unusual and eerie. Oftentimes, bad
etiquette is the first impression that most people give to polygamy. We people has made the standard set of
behavior in a community as what is normal or what is not to do in our
society. Unfortunately, polygamy always
comes in question if it is standard norm in our community. It has impression of so old fashion and
backward.
Generally, polygamy is unpopular because of its negative aspects to
many people. It is our choice. We were given freewill to choose our heart
and mind as long as we do not violate rules in the community we belong.
CONTENT
Polygamy (po·lyg·a·my): is a marriage in which
a spouse of either sex may have more than one mate at the same time. Polygamy is being practices in 60 countries around the
world. It is equivalent to 30% of approximately 200 countries in the
world. By default, these 60 countries
are not necessarily legalizing polygamy but some of them are recognizing it due
to their old tradition and culture, and due to religion. Most of these countries exist in Africa,
Southeast Asia, and the Middle East.
While Middle East is Muslim dominated countries where polygamy is
legally practiced, other countries allow it with some restrictions.
The
opposite of polygamy is monogamy, from Greek word “mono” means “one”. Polygamy started long before our history in
fact it was mentioned in the books of Christians, Hindus, and Muslims. In Quran, it was a response to a specific
social situation. "And if you have reason to fear that you might
not act equitably towards orphans, then marry from among [other] women such as
are lawful to you - [even] two, or three, or four: but if you have reason to
fear that you might not be able to treat them with equal fairness, then [only]
one - or [from among] those whom you rightfully posses. This will make it more
likely that you will not deviate from the right course." (Surah an
Nisaa - Women, 4:3).
In
the Old Testament, many noted men were polygamists in the likes of Abraham,
Jacob, David, Solomon and to name a few.
Solomon alone had 700 wives according to 1 Kings 11:3. In Christian, polygamy was mentioned in
several verses. Among these are in Genesis 4:19 “And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the
one [was] Adah, and the name of the other Zillah”. In “2 Chronicles 11:21 “And Rehoboam loved Maachah the daughter of Absalom
above all his wives and his concubines: (for he took eighteen wives, and
threescore concubines; and begat twenty and eight sons, and threescore daughters.)”
In
these situations, it is believed in Christendom during the ancient time, God only allows for polygamy but does
not command it. God allowed polygamy to
protect the unmarried women because it was almost not possible for an unmarried
woman to provide for herself because during that time, women were uneducated
and untrained. Women were just relied
on their fathers, brothers, and husbands for provision and protection. A man can take multiple wives to serve as the
provider and protector of them all.
Polygamy
still exists in our world today. In most
of us it may unusual in our general perception but there are legal bases and
acceptance to it. Some fundamentalist
from Church of the Latter Day Saints or Mormons continue the practice of
multiple marriages but discontinued it over a century ago and excommunicates
anyone who practices it. In Islam, a man
can have wives if he can be able to provide them all. But other than religious belief, we ask
ourselves why polygamy still exists in this modern world today. In country where polygamy is prohibited, any
person having more than one marriage while still legally married to another
could be charged of “bigamy”. It is
crime and punishable. Unfortunately and
sadly to say, many of these so-called monogamists are committing adultery and
concubenage. And again, unfortunately
they criticize polygamy as taboo but here they are unable to control their
weaknesses in committing the taboo that they are condemning. But on the other hand, countries with its
people accept multiple marriages because it promotes individual rights and
freedom. In reality, in some point,
married people come in time their desire to others. It is now depends on one’s strength and
control. People in polygamous belief,
they have this free option to use this right to marry another one. Specially men, it allows their natural
in-born chauvinism by having as many female partners as possible. Without polygamy, we make men accountable for
unfaithfulness because generally men will still go out to satisfy that desire
to be with many women. On the part of
women, polygamy reduces the statistics of unmarried women in society. In both sides, polygamy helps to prevents
adultery and concubinage. Adultery means
a wife who has carnal relationship with a man who is not her husband while
concubinage means a husband who has sexual relationship with a woman who is not
his wife. And in legal basis, polygamy
scratches these because there is no more legal hindrance. While more male babies are born than female,
men are more likely to die earlier than women either in accidents of from
violent causes. As they go to marrying
age, women outnumbered men and this plays the idea of one man to two women.
While
we may think that polygamy is widespread in the Middle East, it is interesting
to note that polygamy has been more present in the Africa. Reasons are because most African societies
believe more children as form of wealth and more children means to be more
powerful. It also means that more
children means more will cultivate their land.
Also more wives lead to more alliance.
And women believe that they are safe in a large house with more member
of the family. Polygamy is somehow a
survival. Families are practicing it for
the protection of their wealth, and tribes are practicing it for protection of
their population.
Without
taking it in religious reason, polygamy happens in countries with culture of
allowing the powerful men to have more wives like the male leaders to give them
instant impression of the sense of masculinity and strength. Giving these powerful male leaders with more
wives would provide them produce more powerful children who will defend their
tribes. While it is impossible for this
man to have two children in one year with a wife, polygamy allows the man to
have more children with one or more wives within the span of a year. Because a man can father as many children in
a short period while women is limited only to one pregnancy every nine
months. Here, polygamy is for
procreation and for enhancing of their human race. This is more on multiplying the race and it
empowers the family to lead his group or tribe who has this culture.
And behind every successful man are the women who support him and
regarded these women in securing the marriage.
They are acknowledged as the guardian of their leader and this calls
them the reason of their leader’s strength/power. This kind of marriage sees women as great
importance to their husband. It serves
as way of strengthening the husband’s power that is why these women accepted
and acknowledged this kind of marriage.
In Nyinba Nepal, they practice
polyandry, in which one woman has more than one husband. In their culture, when a woman marries a
man, she also marries the brothers of the man.
This kind of marriage arrangement is more on the wealth of the family to
become intact and preserve their ancestral land and wealth too. This set-up of marriage allows all
brothers the equal access to mate with the woman and subsequently, all brothers
should act the father of the children even the family can know the specific
father of a child. But we must remember
also that it depends on belief and culture, there are restrictions and codes in
practicing polygamy. In Islamic tradition, a man is allowed up to four wives,
but only if he can support them and treat them all equally.
Other
than religion and culture, polygamy exists still exists naturally and forcibly
because human by nature has this carnal desire.
As the saying that goes men are born polygamous, by this statement alone
we conclude polygamy seems to be unavoidable because again and again men would
really come forward to look partners.
While women were tagged or labeled as the weaker sex, their desire to
others is there waiting a trigger factor to release. And this factor could be the polygamous men
that surround them, or their poor faith, maybe true affection, or it could of being
liberated and the security reason.
IMPLICATIONS OF POLYGAMY
Religion
There
are two sides of the story, the pro and the anti. Those religions that allow polygamy
definitely have the implications of having strong family tie relationship and
huge love among the family members.
While on the other side, it usually looks against all odds which make
the religion unusual and eerie. Polygamy
is so old fashion and backward.
Community
Oftentimes,
bad etiquette is the first impression that most people give to polygamy. We people has made the standard set of
behavior in a community as what is normal or what is not to do in our
society. Unfortunately, polygamy always
comes in question if it is standard norm in our community.
Beliefs
The implication of polygamy on one’s belief is the careful,
sensitive, and the good handling of relationship. It brings to one’s own belief the ability to
make his or her big family perfect despite the many obstacles, challenges and
criticisms which give them the high esteem and sense of pride.
EFFECTS OF POLYGAMY
Marriage/Relationship
The
main effects of polygamy in marriage or relationship could be jealousy and
inequality. There are no two persons
alike. There will be one who will exceed
over the other. Just like in relationship, one will come out the most loved
over the other and thus treatment will differ.
Children
Since
polygamy is not openly accepted and seems to be not a normal practice,
therefore children of polygamous family usually suffer the stigma of society’s
judgmental people. Children are usually
labeled as product of carnal relationship only and suspected to be turned out
grossly since they are exposed to this set up of marriage.
Family
Most
often than not, the effect of polygamy in a family is the solidarity. The bigger the family is, the stronger, more
durable, more stable and more collaborative.
The more polygamous families, the more unity and solidarity of the
community. And since they are seemed to
be odd, they become independent.
Church
It
has limited and slow propagation of their teachings since polygamous is the
less minority in our society.
Community
In a
community of polygamous people, the effects of polygamy are the unity,
solidarity and knowing each other thus cooperation is always there. As result, they can achieve and reach their
goals with fewer difficulties.
FINDINGS
Through
research from different sites, it is found out that there are some 60 countries
that allow polygamy. This number means
not necessarily permit legally but it can be recognized with restrictions thru
religion, cultural and socially recognized at government level, or may fully or
partially practiced in the below mentioned countries.
|
Name
of Country
|
Special
Remarks
|
|
Afghanistan
|
|
|
Algeria
|
|
|
Australia
|
Foreign marriage when it is entered into will be recognized as a
valid marriage.
|
|
Bahrain
|
|
|
Bangladesh
|
|
|
Bhutan
|
|
|
Brunei
|
|
|
Burkina Faso
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Cameroon
|
|
|
Chad
|
|
|
Central African Republic
|
|
|
Republic of the Congo
|
Determination that is undefined due to communications
|
|
Djibouti
|
|
|
Egypt
|
|
|
Gabon
|
|
|
Gambia
|
|
|
Guinea
|
The most recent country legalized polygamy (January 2018)
|
|
India
|
allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Indonesia
|
Except for in the provinces of Maluku, North Maluku, Papua, and
West Papua
|
|
Iran
|
|
|
Iraq
|
Except for in Iraqi Kurdistan
|
|
Jordan
|
|
|
Kuwait
|
|
|
Lebanon
|
|
|
Libya
|
|
|
Kenya
|
Determination that is undefined due to communications
|
|
Malaysia
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Malawi
|
|
|
Maldives
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Mali
|
|
|
Mauritania
|
|
|
Mongolia
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Morocco
|
|
|
Namibia
|
|
|
Nepal
|
|
|
Nigeria
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Oman
|
|
|
Pakistan
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Philippines
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Qatar
|
|
|
São Tomé and Príncipe
|
|
|
Saudi Arabia
|
|
|
Senegal
|
|
|
Singapore
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Somalia
|
|
|
South Sudan
|
|
|
South Africa
|
|
|
Sri Lanka
|
Allow at some level with Muslim populations or indigenous
populations that recognize them at the government level
|
|
Sudan,
|
|
|
Syria
|
Except in Syrian Kurdistan
|
|
Swaziland
|
Determination that is undefined due to communications
|
|
Solomon Islands
|
|
|
Togo
|
|
|
Tanzania
|
|
|
Uganda
|
|
|
United Arab Emirates
|
|
|
Yemen
|
|
|
Zambia
|
|
|
United Kingdom that
|
As long as they were performed outside of the United Kingdom in
countries that allow it.
|
On
the other hand, polygamy is practice majorly in Muslims and Judaism. Hinduism practices it not for the purpose of
carnal pleasure but for procreation and continuation of family lineage, while
in Buddhism, it is not legal but not forbid.
Latter Day Saints or Mormons used to practice it before but
stopped. Likewise, it is also found out
that despite its existence for thousands of years ago, polygamy is still not
yet widely and openly accepted by the general public.
RECOMMENDATION
Polygamy
is by choice. There is no religion that
commands the obligatory polygamy. In our
intention to live simple, in our purpose to live peacefully and pleasant to the
eyes of the Lord, it is still commendable to practice equality, sincerity and
honesty in marriage. If the community permit
it and the person are absolutely believes on it with full fairness in their
whole heart, then there is no one from us to condemn them. It is still depends in the true integrity of
person in entering polygamy. It is not
just a mature decision but it also requires all kind of strength.
If
there is doubt and prejudice in the first impression about polygamy, it needs
to open the heart, mind and soul not necessarily to accept it but to understand
and respect it. That is it why it is important
to discover polygamy and find out how it affects your conviction and
belief. Read more, do researches,
gather information and facts and come up with the resolution on how to deal with
polygamous people and the polygamy itself.
Since
people has different takes in religious preference, relationships, sexual orientation,
it is recommended for every reader to be sensitive in taking the full context of
this writing. Likewise, by the content of
this term paper, it is recommended for Grade 7 children and above in able to
introduce them the principles of polygamy.
CONCLUSION
It
is difficult to separate religious belief and individual differences when it
comes to polygamy but amidst of this, respect is the first lesson to get in
writing this term paper and it should be loud and clear. Polygamy is part of our history, tradition,
culture and belief since date back to thousands of years ago. But amidst of these, we can still see the
thin line that separates them and personal preference.
There
should be no question on religion but on people who used religion as an excuse,
there is where the doubt comes from. Without
reasoning faith and tradition, some reason of practicing polygamy is the male
greed who wants to be surrounded by women and who uplift self esteem to be respected
as loved by many women, these men are taking advantage the group they come
from. It is male egotism, they are
looking themselves powerful than someone else, exuding self-worth for them to
have these women maybe to prove their excellent physical attribute, virility,
potency, and masculinity. It is very
unfair for women to be used which they do not deserve. Today is 2019 and unfortunately, there are
still men who have high regards to their extreme bigotry to their masculinity. On the other hand, yes there is female
polygamy but it is either in secret or not accepted as show in statistics but
either way, this gives an unfair initial impression to women in polygamy
situation labeling them as merely sex tools and indecent.
Polygamy is anti-women. For women with more than one husband, it is
easy to label them immoral while the men enjoy the reputation of being loved by
not one woman but two or more women. It
puts men in a pedestal where they can be like God who has served by his
servants. It is disrespectful to women. While it allows the women to have more
husbands, it is not as much as obvious as men do have more wives because of
stigma associated to it when it comes to women.
That is why it appears pro-men. It is burden to
the part of women. Being a co-wife is
definitely painful. Living in an
everyday completion with her co-wives is her worst misery. There is tension in the house as to who is
who, there are intrigues as to let say division of household labor between
several wives and jealousy of course. On
the other hand, these are not the cases when a woman has multiple husbands. While it adversely
affects women’s health, it is usually not easy for them to perform her duties
as a wife and mother of children from several husbands. Women are experiencing psychological and
behavioral changes during menstruation cycle.
Polygamy is more on status symbol for men than
women who most often than not prosecuted even it is legally accepted in the
community she belonged. It serves also
for husbands to remarry again if he cannot have child from an infertile woman
without divorcing her. Although
practically speaking, it causes financial strain for the husband to provide all
the needs of his wives. In the oil-rich
countries of Middle East, those who can afford to equally provide all needs of the
wives are the royal family.
On contrary, it brings women to lowest place
when a woman failed to give birth a child.
She will be divorced and in a snap the woman lost herself as individuals
as she has no more identity to the society she belongs. The cycle of divorcing and marrying again
somehow serve practice of polygamy in disguise for those monogamous people.
Men desire to have more than one partner but
their economic status hinders them. As
result, they cannot perform polygamy openly but instead they practice it
secretly. In reality, those monogamy are
secretly performing polygamy. Divorce
and remarrying again is somehow form of polygamy. It is just happened that they are not in
polygamous group but their frequent divorce, legal separation, annulment,
concubenage and even adultery cases loud it as polygamy. By this statement alone we conclude that
polygamy is really for men and started by men.
Arguments
say polygamy saves women from being slaves, prostitutes, helpless old maids and
even from adultery. But we are in the 21st
century now where equality has come up to its highest standpoint so far, women
has more stand now to choose. On
contrary to the argument, it puts down women status to lowest form as sex slave
and children machine which make them less a human.
Regardless
of sex as who between men and women is to call the right or wrong, polygamy
affects on children. They do not learn
the role or feel the love of a committed family environment. They are likely not to know the identity of
their biological parents. They are
judged harshly by outsiders looking in.
Children have difficulty with being accepted.
Historically,
polygamy is an old practice back to our ancient times but in the coming of
different religions and sect, polygamy has set aside. Until in our modern time, we realized that it
is not widely and openly accepted and it is classified backward and taboo
therefore labeled it illegal. Looking at
the number of countries with polygamy appeared to be comparatively small to
think that it has been in this world since long time ago. Many are not practicing social polygamy but
then again may have extra-marital affairs secretly.
Personally,
polygamy for me is totally unacceptable.
What is the use of marriage if we are fine of being a polygamous? We are entering to a vow of love,
faithfulness, loyalty and honesty. There
is no such thing as equality between two persons. It will come out and will come out that there
is the first, the second, the third, and so on.
And this alone invalidates the claim of vow in marriage.
But
this has not just something to do with legal marriage to bring polygamy to
argument but also the unfaithfulness of men who excuses men as the weaker sex
to entertain flirting in any form. With
or without polygamy, whether or not it is legal to get marry again because of
polygamy or enter into a relationship outside marriage, men having
extra-marital affair is selfish, immature, and unacceptable. This is really so unfair for women who as much
as she can try so hard to remain honest.
Polygamy doesn’t exist only in polygamous people but it manifest to
individual who are not faithful to their partner and this is what we need to
address. There are only three rules to
all relationships to avoid unfaithfulness: do not cheat, do not lie and do not
make promises you cannot keep.
DEFINITION OF TERMS
· Adultery (noun) – a voluntary sexual intercourse
between a married person and someone other than that person's current spouse or
partner
· Anti-women (noun)
· Bigamy (noun) – in law: the act of entering into a
marriage with one person while still legally married to another
· Buddhism (noun) – a religion of eastern and
central Asia growing out of the teaching of Siddhārtha Gautama that suffering is
inherent in life and that one can be liberated from it by cultivating wisdom,
virtue, and concentration
· Carnal (noun) –
a: relating to or given to crude bodily pleasures and appetites
gluttony and other carnal activities
b: marked by sexuality
carnal love
· Christianity (noun) – the religion derived from
Jesus Christ, based on the Bible as sacred scripture, and professed by Eastern,
Roman Catholic, and Protestant bodies.
· Church of the Latter Day Saints (noun) – a religion founded in the US in 1830 by Joseph
Smith Jr.
· Concubinage (noun) – cohabitation of a man not
legally married
· Hinduism (noun) – the dominant religion of India that
emphasizes dharma with its resulting ritual and social observances and often
mystical contemplation and ascetic practices
· Judaism (noun) – a religion developed among the ancient
Hebrews and characterized by belief in one transcendent God who has revealed
himself to Abraham, Moses, and the Hebrew prophets and by a religious life in
accordance with Scriptures and rabbinic traditions
· Monogamy (noun) – the practice of marrying only once during a lifetime
· Muslim (noun) – an adherent of Islam
· Polygamy (noun) – is the practice of marrying multiple
spouses.
· Polygamy(adj) – relating to or practicing polygamy.
· Polygyny
(noun) – is a man having more wives and the
· Polyandry
(noun) – is a woman having more husbands.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
https://www.merriam-webster.com/
Merriam-Webster Dictionary
Source, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/polygamy
The Amazon Nation
Source, https://theamazonchick.wordpress.com/2012/07/24/polygamy-around-the-world/
Islamic City (for Quran verse “Surah an Nisaa – Women, 4:3)
Source, https://www.islamicity.org/3079/a-quranic-perspective-on-polygamy/
King James
Bible:
Source, https://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Bible-Verses-About-Polygamy/
Got Question’s
Source, https://www.gotquestions.org/polygamy.html
APNews
Source, https://www.apnews.com/dee38fc829a84359a5bee3d25938b0b2
howstuffworks
Source, https://people.howstuffworks.com/polygamy.htm
http://www.islamkorea.com/english/pdf/Polygamy%20in%20Judaism%20and%20Christianity-430789.pdf
World Health Organization South-East Asia
http://www.searo.who.int/entity/health_situation_trends/data/chi/sex-ratio/en/
World Atlas
https://www.worldatlas.com/articles/are-there-more-men-or-women-in-the-world.html