Thursday, January 20, 2011

MY BOSS AND I

Practically, the labor and employment are dominated by the rank and file employees in terms of numbers. However, business in reality is dominated by the lesser Officers who are more powerful and authoritative. Although they are outnumbered by their subordinates, labor is actually controlled by the capitalists and officers. In a typical office environment, the office is consisting of one boss and numbers of staff which this alone means one is ruling over the many. In this situation, these staff are all cooperating, following and accepting the methods and approach of the boss that represents the management which owns by the entrepreneurs.

That is why it is important to establish a good relationship with your boss to have a smooth-sailing business, no matter how distasteful your boss is, you should exert effort to be liked by him. Well I had the situation. I have worked with a scrupulous, invincible, commanding and intelligent boss for more than four years. During the early years of our working together, I have undergone in what I called emotionally battered when I had repeatedly received his anger because of work mistakes which I never experienced in my past companies. Given it the consideration, I tried to be not too sensitive and I ignored the feeling of self pity and shame every time he got up-set to me. Giving myself the chance to learn from my work mistakes and to know him more – I thought I can overcome that period that drastically transformed me in a just so-so trainee. It ruined my personality and destroyed my confidence. Pessimism and hesitation ruled over the supposedly good foundation in my new work.

Colleagues advised me to stay where I was posted since my boss is not telling me to get out. Other superiors told me don’t leave without my boss’s instruction or until he complained to remove me. Over the years that advice made me barren and stagnant - it felt me unmotivated. Staying under pressured because of fear to meet the high standard of my boss corrupted my self-esteem. Cramming with the growing number of works drained my comprehension. I was occupied and exhausted which fails me to deliver good outcome. It gave me worse situation – more pressured and tensed than before. Worries to meet the expectations and thinking of not a good employee are always hounding me. Fear that anytime I will be called to scold again because of the errors and will get offended again. I cannot learn my lesson well because of these – they kept me disturbed and unease.

I endured all of these until I became fed up and I laid my cards. To put it in black and white, I sent message to my boss requesting him to replace me with an effective one that can fill my shortcomings and weaknesses since I was never good to him. I would like to give myself chance to find new hope and build again my self-esteem which I have lost while I am working with him. Well, he did not allow me to leave. I was contractual employee and by nature I cannot just leave as a regular employee can. When I did this, he spoke me and in contrary, he told me the things that I did not expect him to say about me. He said I am indeed an excellent employee and he cannot find someone else would do better job than me. Saying I was just over sensitive about making a slip but then again it is just fair for a professional person like me. In short, I went on to work with him until my contract expired.

Well I felt it was just a sort of comfort to an employee who wished to go, but I accepted it anyway. In fairness, my boss is professional even during those times he was getting up-set on me. He was so strict and he was striking me on all-work-matters only, and there was nothing personal I can say against him. After that time, it was not the same again – my boss had changed since then. He was still strict but a bit lesser. I am just little sorry why it needs to go up to that much before the better day come.

Alex V. Villamayor
January 20, 2011

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