When aged 50’s to 60’s, people start to realize the fast life, and the shortness of life too. These are the ages you hear the bad news when any of your relatives, the person next to your neighborhood, classmates or school mates, your childhood friends, former co-workers, the celebrities you used to watch have passed away. These are the years when you often hear about deaths. You may not be in same age. Some of them are few years younger than you or little ahead than you but you are in same generation. Few ones have already gone too soon before reaching 50, it is like you feel it seems you have just seen or talked to them just the other day, and now they have already gone this fast and early. When you are realizing those you used to be with are now starting to leave, you can really say life is really very short.
You are busy working until you realized life is so fast. You worked hard for long thirty years or more, and you are now just starting to enjoy your life, and you will realize you will just enjoy your life for maybe ten years? Sometimes I do ask myself and I wonder if I can use to enjoy to the fullest of what I have worked so hard. When I heard someone died let say at age 65, I can't help to think that I only have few years left to enjoy the fruits of my hard labor. I have this feeling that after I got them for long years and will just enjoy them for few years, is it kind of unfair? There is no guarantee to live another ten, twenty, or thirty years, and I just feel it is unfair living so hard and painful for long years and just enjoy your life for short years only. There is no guarantee at age 70 if I can still able to walk far, travel long distance, and enjoy what I am enjoying now, so I expect the coming years to enjoy is not that much anymore. But I believe when I reach there, God has way of redirecting my happiness to different spectrum. I am just hoping I do not cross the existential crisis while I am aging. I don't want to feel losing all the meaning and purpose of life of an old man.
In recent years, I am starting loosing people. Those I used to be with, whom in one way or another that in some points of our lives we had been mutually at ease with each other have gone. I had classmates, co-workers, and some colleagues who have already gone, and of course my mother too. Now, all I am holding on to is the words to ponder about the value of life. I think, no matter how long or short your existence in this earth, when you able to perform the roles you opted to play, the life you choose to live, and the ambitions you worked hard to build, the full circle of life is served. The cycle of life is complete even if you didn’t go through the so called concept of life which is to undergo the series of stages passes from the beginning stage to end and repeat by you r offspring to continue the cycle. Everybody started from surpassing the miscarriage pregnancy, sad that there are few that did not make it during infancy, toddler years, and childhood. Another few are not able passed the puberty age, adolescence and adulthood. There are unlucky ones who did not make it to enter the middle age, and blessed are those who reach to senior years. That is why being golden age is blessing to thank for because not all were blessed to become, especially during these times where life span is really short. Much more to those who crossed the mark of 80's and centenarian they are truly the chosen ones to experience such. But my big realization in life is that you don’t have to worry if you will not able to reach to the last, because what really matters most is you served and ended the life you lived right.
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