Although it’s still long way to go
but at this moment, I have already a strong desire to become sixty-year old man.
No, it is not the mysterious or magical unexplainable short-cut way of
transforming myself into an old man but it is the idea of fast-forwarding the
life to become old. I still want to go
through the normal life and experience all the things that I have to undergo
but what it seems that I wanted is to make it done now and know what have happened. Both curious and bored, I want to see what
the future lies on me.
I want to turn sixty years old now
to enjoy being retired, pensioned and live the simple life that I outlined in
my dream. I want to leave the stressful work and enjoy the fruit of my
hard-earned employee’s retirement benefits, social security, annuity, and
etcetera. I’ve been working for long and
I think everything is just the same every day. Sometimes I ask myself if
my perseverance, hard work, loyalty and hardship to my work are really worth to
do because I am doubt if they are really rewarded. I’m fed up to my work and
dealing with many superiors, that feeling of the need to perfect your work to
please your boss, the feeling of obliged to wake up as early as 4 o’ clock in
the morning every day and diligently work for 8 hours or more. I’m tired
to work the job again and again that is unappreciated and not properly
rewarded, it is exhausting. And I feel unlucky that my attempts to
find the ideal job for me is always denied, it is frustrating. I can’t
help but to compare myself with those best colleagues. I would say we
could be equally working good but what makes my edge over them is my attitude - working
beyond eight hours, loyalty to do the job without skipping for personal errand,
and honesty to claim only the pay for what I really worked for. I am not
hoping a better compensation, eyeing a higher position, or acknowledge my work
performance but what I wanted is to feel appreciated in my work. Call it conditional, I love my job but I need
my job to love me in return.
I already want to enjoy the
remuneration of my retirement and the pension for myself. It is said that
by the time you get older will come out the different illness, it makes the
retirement benefits you get will not be enjoyed because they will go only
for your medical maintenance needs. I
know that but I am positive to be a healthy old man. I may have
illness from my old age but I don’t think it’ll be acute. I am not afraid and bothered about this
because I am not abusing myself. That is why I am taking care my health
today to enjoy soon the life of being old. I want to feel the privileges
given to senior citizens, received the respect accorded to the oldies, and the sense
of importance bestowed to them. I want to know how and what is life to be
an old age. I want to live the dreamed retirement home that I sketched,
my rest house, my future sanctuary. I want to live in a rural-like home
far from noise, materialism and crowd. I want to go back to my old
habits and enjoyment - the planting. Living in a simple and resilient
house built in a spacious lot where I can do gardening as my recreation and
diversion is what I wanted. I want to live simple where I get my foods
and water within my yard.
Not everyone wishes to become old
for they are busy to enjoy their youth but am.
Maybe my lackluster, unexciting and uninteresting life made me think all
these things and brought me the feeling of fast-tracking the life to get
there. I was not as weird as like this before when I was in my teens till
my early thirties where I wanted more, where I planned the ambitions, where I
searched my purpose and where I was afraid to get old. I survived the so
called mid-life crisis and with happiness now, I want to start the last part of
our life.
By Alex V. Villamayor
May 19, 2016
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