Wednesday, February 17, 2016


Sometimes, there are people who come in to our life that we easily feel comfortable with and we found them positive.  That even in your first chance you met them, there is instant bonding that hold in you.  This happens in couples and even in friends in any gender.  But how you feel if someone you loved to be your friend is taking you for granted?  That is hurting.  When you have friend, and if it is a true friendship, you always think the well-being of each other because friendship is a two-way and a give and take relationship.  It is understanding each other.  When someone is in need, the other one comes to rescue and support.  And in return, it is the same thing when the other one is in need.

Sometimes you can make yourself fool for someone to protect your friendship, or to build if it is new friendship.  When you did what would make someone happy, when you are giving the needs, helping out the problems, rescuing in times of trouble and yet you do not feel contented and appreciated, you will feel something is missing and wrong.  It is sad to say and accept that some people can be coined “user friendly” especially when you happened to observe one of your friends and you realized you were used only.  It is hurtful because you care for your friend that you don’t want to hurt them but you will feel and you will even know that your friend is the kind of opportunist.  You can be in denial because it is your friendship, a friendship that you care will put into waste.  You don’t want it to happen as much as possible but when the time you have enough, you will not regret in this kind of friendship.

Some people are just capitalizing their strength to gain, abuse and take advantage others’ weaknesses be it colleague, partner, friend or even lover.  There are people who can stand to abuse the kindness of other people because they know they cannot be rejected.  Others are using their looks when they knew someone is attracted in their strong pleasing looks, or if someone believes on them, incapable without them, and these weaknesses will be used for their benefits.  They abuse the kindness while they know they cannot be able to withstand.  This is so unfair, it is pity when there is in pain, losing, and aggrieved.  Any relationship, be it friendship, romance, career or social is always nice and proper to be fair and square.

You spread love, you want to make your friends happy, and you just love pleasing others by making good but sadly they are people who are not worth and deserved your efforts.  When you helped genuine you will feel the return.  When you cannot feel the contentment after what you did, then that is not love.  Maybe it is just a fancy feeling towards a friend or someone you thought your other half.  This is not the real friendship, not right relationship, not pure love.  Because love is a good feeling you give to someone.  You don’t want to hurt your children, parents, partner, your brother and sister.  Instead you want to make them happy all the time.  You want to give nothing but only the best for that one you love.  Not for you, but you just want to do it for them and you feel happy for that – that is love, an unconditional love.  If everyone will be fair, we can build a friendly place to live in.  Avoid being called user friendly.  In our everyday life let us make friends not adversaries.  Mark Zuckerberg said during the FaceBook’s celebration of Friends Day “the everyday acts of friendship that make our relationships matter. Friendship adds meaning to our lives and is a force that moves the world”.

By Alex V. Villamayor
February 16, 2016

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